Evil Elves Have Taken Over My Life!

What was I thinking, leaving town for a few days to help with my dad?  Aren’t good deeds to be rewarded?  Though all seemed fine and dandy when I returned, I quickly realized that total chaos reigned in my absence.

All week I have been doing laundry and picking up messes. In an attempt to find his floor and the source of “that smell”, my oldest pulled all his laundry to the first floor to sort and sniff.  We think that the cat may have been locked in his room for an extended period, hence “that smell”.

My son’s comforter sprung a leak and the whole downstairs is now coated in a thin layer of goose down.  The dryer keeps spewing up little tufts of down every time I clean the filter.  My other son emptied the garbage and all that downy lint from the dryer coated the whole place again with a fresh layer of dustiness. 

I feel like the shoemaker, up to my eyes in work, work, work.  Unfortunately, the elves that come to my house in the middle of the night only make more work for me.  I drop to my bed in exhaustion and those elves are still eating, drinking, and making general mayhem instead of something useful like shoes.

Football season is in full swing and both boys are eating four or five meals a day so the bread maker is going twice a day now.  Just to add more chaos to my day, the dog got into the bread drawer while I was gone on another school shopping scavenger hunt and ate this morning’s loaf.

My laundry room is littered with large pieces sports equipment, helmets, and shoes.  Once the laundry is under control, I plan to collect all the items that need to be put away and pile them on the dining room table.  I think I’ll withhold food until these items are all put in their proper places.

Tonight, I’ll booby trap the public areas of the house in an attempt to drive the evil elves away.  A refrigerator lock and removal of the gaming system and mouse for the computer should do the trick.  Perhaps then life can return to normal.  There are so many other things I’d like to be doing.

To read about some sure fire suggestions for getting boys to put away their protective supporters, see “Check It Out!”.